Kosmic’s Top Ten NHL Draft Prospects: #1 Patrik Laine

Hey guys! Can you believe that it’s the end of April already? And that in exactly 2 days we will find out just where we stand in the pecking order known as the 2016 NHL Draft. Come on, as a sad fanbase let’s face it, this IS our playoffs. This upcoming weekend will determine a lot for Edmonton. For example, where we land in the draft order is going to decide, I think, whether we trade the pick or use it to draft someone. Personally, I think that if they fall outside of the Top 3 then they will end up trading the pick. Possibly packaging it up with one of their many rumoured wingers/forwards for some top-notch help on the “D”. But that’s just my take on this…

PLEASE Hockey Gods, let this be the last year that we care about which position we get in the draft! I’ll do anything!! Even sacrifice my youngest! Sorry Caleb, but you’re a ginger…it was bound to happen sooner or later! I KEED, I KEED! I JOKE! HaHa! But for real….it’s almost the Oilers time to shine! It’s Lottery Time! So buckle up mofo’s!!! Heeeeeeeeere’s Numero Uno…..


Patrik Laine – LW/RW
Tappara (Liiga Finland)
6’4″ 211lbs
46GP 17G 16A 33PTS 6PIM 6+/-

Ok so I’m going to try something new, and start off by saying the worst possible thing that I noticed, and read about this prospect….his skating. Trust me, it’s not too much of a knock either, or really even one at all. So he isn’t the fastest skater and he takes big, long, powerful strides. Scouts say that he’s very reminiscent of Mario freaking Lemieux when he skates, yeah that guy! How did he do in his career? LOL! Being compared to Super Mario in any regard is never a bad thing.

So moving along to his many lovable traits, skills, and characteristics. Patrik Laine is about as complete of a natural goal scorer as you can possibly get. Seriously, he possesses an absolute laser beam of a shot that leaves fire trails similar to everyone’s favorite time traveling Delorean. What a bomb, this is the shot that every coach craves to have for his powerplay. He has an ultra quick release wrist’er, and a behemoth of a blast when he unleashes his slapper or snapper. His ability to read the play more often than not puts him in an advantageous position to shoot the puck. He’s constantly thinking out on the ice, and loves to create plays himself. He is a big bodied winger that I think is perfectly built for the much larger Western Conference. Now I’m not saying that he’s overly physical, not at all. But he definitely knows how to use his size and reach to his advantage, and can hang with the big boys as well. He will use his massive frame to drive players off the puck, and doesn’t really shy away from mixing it up when he needs to.

His defensive game could use a little work, not much though, and come on? That’s not really why you’d be drafting Patrik Laine. You’d draft him for his uncanny ability to score! Remember, Patrik is a 2016 Liiga Champion and playoff MVP, as well as a 2016 World Junior Champion and All-Star. So he knows what it takes to win and lead a team to the promised land.

NHL Comparable(s): Alexander Ovechkin, and Mario Lemieux.

Why would this player be on the Oilers Draft List? Well, because we’d land an elite, top-notch natural goal scorer to possibly compliment McDavid for years and years to come…and…we’d also get a s**t load of options. Options you say? Why yes fine fellow, options a plenty!

First of all, if we draft Laine, we wouldn’t need to even think twice about trading an Eberle, or Yakupov for some help on the “D”. Or maybe who knows, it could influence a major trade involving Taylor Hall. As I believe that this kid is going to step straight into the league and light it up like his name was Bob Marley!

Another option is, we flip the pick itself for some immediate help. One suggestion out there, is that if the Oilers do land the 1st overall pick then we should trade it to whoever drafts 2nd overall. People are suggesting they then make a “Lindros” like trade with that team involving the 2nd overall, and then draft Laine. Now I just don’t see that happening in the cap-era, but could you imagine? We could possibly fix our defense and bottom six in the trade, and then draft Patrik Laine!!

If only, but in reality, who knows…like Kevin Garnett said “ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE!!”. Honestly though, as amazing as it would be to have Matthews, I think we’re more than set at “C” with McWizard, Dr. Drai, and RNH. Me personally, I’d love to have the opportunity to see McDavid and Laine become the new Gretzky and Kurri.

Well my friends, that concludes my 2016 Top Ten Oilers Draft Prospects series. Stay tuned and see what I have in-store for you next! As always, stay trippy!!

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Kosmic Burrito Written by:

  • Joe

    Dude, Laine is not #1. But he is awesome, no question. I hope we win the lottery and make a Lindros trade with whomever picks #2 so we land Laine and other goodies, and Chiarelli gets to make up for his folly and incompetence last year of getting Reinhart when he should have got Kyle Connor and Brandon Carlo instead.

    • Kosmic Burrito

      Don’t get me wrong, Matthews is stellar and all. And I do hope that we get the #1 obviously, and flip it for a magical Lindros like trade, and still draft Patrik Laine! But in my honest opinion, we don’t need Matthews at all. We have the McWizard and friends! But! We will need some top notch wingers to fill in the blanks, after Chia Pete trades some away to fix our “D” problem…Enter the Finnish sniper! This guy can literally score from anywhere bro, like the rare Ovechkin type. Remember, I wrote this series from an “Oilers Draft needs” point of view. Not a “number one consensus” or “draft the best player available” type of mentality. Thanks so much for the feedback Joe, I strongly respect your opinion!

      • Joe

        We are on the same page, Amigo. It’s those other goodies that come from a Lindros haul that we could use in addition to Lindros. Supposedly, Arizona, Toronto, and Columbus (and I’m sure many others) would all LOVE to get the right to draft Matthews. I think Yakupov will pick up where he left off his 1st year….going forward Yakupov McDavid Laine could be a line for the ages.