Monthly Archives: September 2016

Armchair GM, Beer League Hero, Edmonton Oilers, NHL, Prospects, Rumors, Trades

Oilers Can’t Do That

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This is a post that will anger some and appeal to others but it’s mainly going to be some ramblings about the week’s going ons in the land of Oilersville. I want to chat about the Young Stars tourney that went down in Penticton, Richard Cloutier’s latest blog about trading Nugent-Hopkins, Kris Russell, and something the Oilers haven’t done since they went to the finals in ’06.

So let’s get started!

PULJUJARVI DESTROYS PENTICTON

Was it 6 points in 2 games that the Grinnin’ Finn put up against mostly junior, ECHL, and maybe some AHL talent in the glorious lands of the Okanagan? Well regardless, I’m looking forward to seeing him versus some better players once the pre-season gets started (hopefully on Oct.6th when I’ll be in attendance at the game versus the Jets).

Puljujarvi took about 2 shifts to get himself sorted and then it was game one. That goal you see above was bloody breathtaking. We all know that Pulju can move but on this particular tally he was at the end of his shift and I knew once he got the puck he was going to slow that train down and make some magic. He zipped that puck right past Demko’s ear with ZERO wind-up in a manner Mario Lemieux would’ve been proud of.

As for the rest of the team in Penticton, I was impressed with:

  • Matt Benning – Grit personified. Moves the puck well and doesn’t get bogged down.
  • Markus Niemelainen – So smooth with the puck. Looks like Martin Marincin but is much better. I was told he could play for the Oilers on the bottom pairing in 2016 but that he’ll be sent back to the OHL because the days of rushing teenagers into the league are over.
  • Nick Ellis/Dylan Wells/Kevan Bouchard – Did these guys play well, do the Oilers finally have some defence coming up, or did the other teams just play terribly? I though Ellis looked outstanding versus the Canucks, Wells was organized chaos against the Flames, and Bouchard somehow made it work against the Jets. Out of the three, Ellis was the best.
  • Ben Betker – The guy who complimented my Beer League Heroes jersey at the Golden Bears/Oilers Prospects game two years ago played the role of team leader very well. Slow wheels but massive frame. I’m not sure if he’ll ever see an NHL game in his career but I liked the way he lead the team on the ice.

Some players of note that didn’t do much for me include:

  • Drake Caggiula – Pretty pedestrian debut in my opinion. As I sit here writing, I cannot recall one highlight that stood out for him. Needs AHL time most definitely.
  • Caleb Jones – You could see flashes of his brother in the way he skates but I’d say he was average.
  • Ethan Bear – Played a game and then left for personal reasons. Hard to get excited for him when that one game he was barely noticeable.
  • Joey Benik – Took advantage of his linemates, that’s for sure. Who wouldn’t put up points on a line with Puljujarvi and Caggiula?
  • Kayle Doetzel – Apart from this fight below… Nadda. Good scrap though given he was dealing with a horrible migraine at the time.

IS NOW THE TIME TO TRADE “THE NUGE”?

We all thought that last season Nugey was going to break out and man were we wrong. It was a not a great year for the Oilers centre as injuries slowed him the “F” down but he is looking like a man renewed at this year’s World Cup of Hockey, isn’t he?

Famed Oilers blogger, Richard Cloutier, penned a piece claiming that now is the time to deal 2011 first overall pick for a right-handed defenseman. He says,

Because of the additions of McDavid and Leon Draisaitl, confusion set in as to where Nugent-Hopkins fit into the roster. He’s too good to be a third line center…

First off, everybody has to start letting go of this traditional way of thinking when it comes to how line-ups are constructed. Teams are moving away from having their top 6 do all of the scoring, their 3rd line doing the checking, and their 4th line being the energy line.

Lowetide often talks about unicorns, meaning three scoring lines. THIS is where the Penguins found success this past year right? Crosby/Hornqvist on the 1st line, Malkin/Kunitz on the 2nd, and Kessel/Bonino/Hagelin, on the third. That means they were throwing mad offense in waves at their opponents at any given moment.

THIS is where hockey is headed, so don’t think for one minute that the Oilers need to dismantle the three-headed dragon that they’ve played so horribly to attain. McDavid will draw every team’s top pairing D, Nuge will get the heavies (meaning he’ll have to play against the other team’s best centres, something he’s been doing his whole career AND he’ll get the shat zone starts), and Draisaitl will get the 3rd pairing and cherry zone starts.

The reason Draisaitl is having a fair-to-midland time at the World Cup?

If you can convince Woodguy that Draisaitl would be a better fit playing above his level, then I’ll side with you but good luck. I think someone also mentioned that Draisaitl was playing with annual all-stars Nino Niederreiter and Tobias Reider… Oh, what? They’re not annual all-stars and one of those guys has yet to sign a contract for the upcoming season? Weird.

The Oilers backed away from making a Nugent-Hopkins deal this summer because there simply wasn’t enough of a market for him.

I think there’s more truth to the fact that any deal that Peter Chiarelli was looking to make had to include Taylor Hall. Now, Clouts is a man in the know for the most part but I know that there were teams interested in Ryan Nugent-Hopkins (Colorado) but the Oilers weren’t so interested in moving him. That’s my source vs. Richard’s, so take it for what it is.

The final note on this topic is just as I spoke of teams moving towards the “unicorns” way of building a line-up, they’re also going to add a dusting of Babcockian to it. What this means is that if you’re a winger going forward, you’d better be able to take draws and you’d better be a 200ft player. OR you’d better be the next coming of Alex Ovechkin… Teams are going to want two players on each line that can take faceoffs, it’s as simple as that. What good are you if you’re only competent at one aspect of the game?

KRIS RUSSELL/ERIC GRYBA

I’ve been told the same thing that all of you are hearing from Jason Gregor, Ryan Rishaug, and Bob Stauffer… The Oilers are still negotiating with Kris Russell but, as Stauffer put it, it’s unlikely that he lands in Edmonton. He wants $4-5M per year for 4-5 years… That’s facking insane! Either he’s crazy of his agent has lost it.

Eric Gryba is a much better fit for the team as it is and my source told me that Chiarelli will continue to talk to the Russell camp but they won’t budge off of a 1-2 year deal around $1M per year and that by getting Gryba to agree to the PTO, the intention is to put pressure on Russell to make a decision.

I don’t really want Russell on the Oilers. I don’t believe he’s a 2nd pair defenseman. Simply put.

THE VETERAN MOVEMENT

Lucic – McDavid – Versteeg
Pouliot – Nuge – Eberle
Maroon – Richards – Draisaitl
Hendricks – Letestu – Kassian

Klefbom – Larsson
Sekera – Fayne
Davidson – Gryba
Oesterle

Now check this line-up out. Nearly every line has two centres and the youth are insulated by veterans. If this isn’t a way to escape the sins of the past, I’m not sure what is. No Yak, No Puljujarvi, Draisaitl on the wing and Nurse/Reinhart in the AHL…

*Just an aside, I know Bob Stauffer was talking about the whole “Nurse should start the year in the AHL” twitter movement yesterday and he was against it IIRC. But what’s the difference between that and Yakupov starting on McDavid’s line? By the numbers, Nurse definitely needs more seasoning in Bakersfield and Yakupov belongs on McDavid’s wing. There’s not much to support Nurse starting in the NHL in 2016 if the Oilers are adding more veterans to their team.*

Peter Chiarelli is going to be looking to add more veterans to this team as teams are looking to make room on their own teams for young players and guys that surprise their team and make a veteran expendable.

What do you think about today’s post? Let us know in the comments below!

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Beer League Hero, Edmonton Oilers, NHL, Rumors

Look Forward to These Oilers Rumours in 2016

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Before we get into the nitty gritty of this post, I want to talk shop about the World Cup, then we’ll delve head-first into the rumours.

Wow! Taylor Hall passed over for a FOURTH TIME!!! How did Twitter react?

So there you have it. Opinions vary but if you’re still confused as to why Hall was left off, consider these factors:

  • Hall won’t play centre. Hockey Canada wants players that are versatile.
  • Hall doesn’t play C, therefore, he can’t take draws. O’Reilly is outstanding on the dot.
  • Hall’s off-ice attitude is well-known throughout the league. Maybe Hockey Canada would like to stay away players throwing hissy fits on the bench when their coach sets them straight.
    • O’Reilly did drive a truck into a Tim Horton’s though… So there is that.
  • The quality of competition between the World’s and this World Cup isn’t exactly equal. So throw that out the window.
    • Easy for Hall to put up points versus international powerhouses like Germany, France, Hungary, or Belarus but what about the games where it mattered? Where was he then?
  • Lastly, and most importantly, Taylor Hall picks his nose and eats it.

When Taylor Hall figures out that this is a TEAM game and it’s not all about him, be it on the ice or where ever, he’ll become the player that Hockey Canada calls on. But until then, I think we can stop caring about if he ever makes the national team. He’s a New Jersey Devil now.

THE WORLD CUP

The first two games versus Team Europe were something to behold. The speed and skills were on full display. McDavid didn’t pick up any points but he opens up space for his linemates, who’ve been plenty so far. I think it’s funny that the media is starting to compare him to Crosby in that it’s hard to find a linemate that can play with him. It’s not really, find two guys that don’t need the puck all the time. Eichel and Gaudreau need the puck all the time. I thought Scheifele did okay with 97 in the first pre-tourney game and I was impressed with how Connor played with Auston Matthews in the 3rd period of the game versus the Czechs. But ultimately, maybe it’s Drouin and MacKinnon that will be the best linemates for him.

Yesterday was a helluva day for Oilers and former Oilers as Ales Hemsky had a superb outing versus the North American team. Made me fawn over days past when Hemsky’s hands were as soft as a cloud and of course, I wondered if he’d be a player the Oilers would be interested in but then I thought better of that because we know Chiarelli is not a fan of “soft” players…

Neon Leon Draisaitl… A hat-trick versus the Swedes and we’re not wondering if he can do it without Taylor Hall, are we?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UigWUfg3SII

The Oilers Rumours We’ll Be Hearing in 2016

I believe that the Oilers will unload another $6M man by the start of 2017 and that man will be Jordan Eberle. The reason I believe that is because I’m not sure how much Chiarelli and McLellan enjoy Eberle’s lack of a two-way game and his lack of intensity. Not that he needs that to be successful but show a bit of sandpaper from time-to-time, right?

Now, what will make dealing Eberle easier is Brad Marchand coming onto the market. Does anybody believe in what the Bruins are doing over there? They look like a sinking ship but lucky for them they’ve got Marchand, Bergeron and Rask holding things up.

I reckon that the Oilers will be very interested in adding a player like Brad Marchand. He’s got the edge that Chiarelli loves and he scores goals. But the kicker here is, when he’s not scoring goals; he’s helping the team in other ways whether that be on special teams or just annoying the other teams. Don’t tell me you wouldn’t want him on the Oilers and what happens when Eberle or Yakupov stop scoring?

*This is just an aside, a personal thought if you will, but I wonder what happens if Philly or Boston starts slow, do you think they’d be willing to get together with Edmonton and Boston for a 3-way? Maybe Simmonds to Boston, Ebs to Philly and Marchand to Edmonton?

Simmonds has three seasons left @ 3.975M and has a modified NTC. Marchand is making $4.5M right now but is a UFA after this season coming up and Eberle has three more years @ $6M. So obviously there’d have to be some more to the deals. (source)*

That $6M on Eberle next to Simmonds’ and Marchand’s salary looks bloated eh?*

The other rumour I believe we’ll be hearing is the Oilers going after Brent Burns.

How much do you think adding Burns and Marchand will cost the Oilers in straight up cash? $15M?

Brent Burns is making $5.76M right now and he’s 31 years old. Could we shoot that up to around $7M or $7.5M per year on the open market? I think those would be reasonable numbers but the term… THE TERM!!! If I were Chiarelli, I’d need him to sign for 5 years maximum. Getting up there around 36/37 years old is a dangerous game. But it’s quite possible that Burns’ next contract will be his last, so… Bump that term up to 7 years and maybe he goes the way of the Ference… Er I mean the dodo.

What about Marchand? He’s making $4.5M this season, so do you give him Eberle’s $6M for 7 years? Surely, that’s what he’d be looking for. Something along the lines of what Lucic signed for.

Yup, I’m saying that Chiarelli will be looking at adding his coach’s former team’s best defender and his own former team’s best scoring winger. How could it be any other way? Isn’t that how things work?

Of course, everything is dependent upon where the Oilers are come trade deadline. If they are in a playoff spot or fighting for one, expect some of the defensive depth the Oilers have accrued through the draft to be used as well as 1st round picks.

Would it be smart for Edmonton to add those two players? I think it would be but they’d have to be clever in how they do it. Connor McDavid, Leon Draisaitl, and Darnell Nurse are all players that will be putting a major dent in the Oilers’ salary cap sooner than later.

Maybe we say goodbye to Nuge and Sekera too? Shall we take a look at a modified pre-2017/18 roster?

Lucic-McDavid-Marchand
Pouliot-Draisaitl-Puljujarvi
Maroon-Cagguila-Slepyshev
Khaira-Letestu-Kassian

Klefbom-Burns
Davidson-Larsson
Nurse-Fayne

Talbot
Brossoit

What do you think? Let me know in the comments below!

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Beer League Hero, Edmonton Oilers, NHL

Oilers’ Fantasy Hockey Preview 2016/17

The main man over at All In Hockey is Scott Maran (@realallinhockey) and he’s ever-so-graciously offered to give us a sneak peek at All In Hockey’s Edmonton Oilers Fantasy Hockey Preview! It’s not a complete preview but a snapshot of what Scott thinks the Oilers top forwards, dmen, and starting goalie are capable of next season. Basically, the only players you really want to be concerning yourself with for your fantasy hockey team. 

Now you might not know about All In Hockey right now but you should get to know it because it’s a real up-and-comer in the hockey blogosphere!

Click the logo to head over to All In Hockey right now!
What’s in store for the Edmonton Oilers in 2016/17?

Last Year’s Stats

Record: 31-43-8 (29th)
Goals For: 203 (25th)
Goals Against: 245 (tied 25th)
Powerplay Percentage: 18.14% (18th)
Penalty Killing Percentage: 80.71% (19th)
Shooting Percentage: 8.3% (tied 25th)
Save Percentage: .910% (21st)

Line Combinations

Milan Lucic – Connor McDavid – Jordan Eberle
Benoit Pouliot –Ryan Nugent-Hopkins– Zack Kassian
Patrick Maroon –Leon Draisaitl – Nail Yakupov
Matt Hendricks – Mark Letestu – Iiro Pakarinen

Oscar Klefbom – Adam Larsson
Andrej Sekera – Mark Fayne
Brandon Davidson – Darnell Nurse

Cam Talbot – Jonas Gustavsson

Thoughts:

* I’m sure Connor McDavid’s linemates will change frequently throughout the season but Milan Lucic should get a lot of time next to him

* The Oilers defense is still a little weak but Oscar Klefbom and Adam Larsson will give them at least one defensively reliable pairing

* While I’m a big supporter of Nail Yakupov playing with Connor McDavid, the Oilers staff doesn’t seem to love that idea

* If Jesse Puljujarvi makes the team, he’d probably start on the third line with Patrick Maroon and Leon Draisaitl, bumping Nail Yakupov to the second line and Zack Kassian to the fourth line. Or, Puljujarvi could start on the second line and Yakupov would stay on the third line.

Projections (82 GP)

Connor McDavid- 34 goals, 55 assists, 89 points

Last year McDavid had one of the most impressive seasons by a rookie, scoring 48 points in only 45 games with the Oilers. Only two other players in the entire NHL had a higher point-per-game rate than McDavid and he actually scored at a better rate than superstars like Sidney Crosby, Evgeni Malkin, Tyler Seguin and Joe Thornton. Expect much of the same dominance from McDavid as he continues his ascent to the top of the league.

Jordan Eberle- 28 goals, 34 assists, 62 points

At the start of the season last year, Eberle had scored at least 60 points for the past four years in a row, even breaking the 70-point mark in 2012. However, last season Eberle only managed to tally 47 points in 69 games, a 56-point pace over 82-games. Most of the reason for this can be explained by an abnormal lack of powerplay success, with Eberle only recording four powerplay assists. If Eberle had recorded his average amount of powerplay assists last year, he’d have scored a total of 55 points in 69 games, a much better 65-point pace. Considering Eberle should be a bit more luckier on the powerplay next year and has been shooting the puck a lot more too, there’s good upside in drafting Eberle this year.

Milan Lucic- 23 goals, 36 assists, 59 points

If you thought playing with Anze Kopitar would increase Lucic’s value, just imagine what McDavid will do. Last year McDavid showed that he had a profound effect on his linemate’s point totals and Lucic won’t be any different. Scoring 20 goals and 35 assists last year, Lucic should do even better this season now that he’s lining up next to “The Next One” himself. Don’t expect anything too crazy but Lucic will probably end somewhere close to 60 points.

Ryan Nugent-Hopkins- 23 goals, 32 assists, 55 points

Injuries have plagued Nugent-Hopkins’ career so far but if he can stay on the ice, he should be a lock for 50 points. Scoring only 34 points in 55 games, Nugent-Hopkins had one of his worst statistical years last season as he averaged 50 points over 82 games. However, in the two seasons prior to that, he scored 56 points in 80 games and then 56 points in 76 games. With Nugent-Hopkins rated 244th by Yahoo, he could easily outperform his draft position.

Benoit Pouliot- 20 goals, 35 assists, 45 points

Ever since coming to the Oilers, Pouliot has actually been very productive. In his first season, he managed to score 19 goals and 15 assists in only 58 games, averaging out to a 48-point pace over a full 82-game schedule. Then, in his second year as an Oiler, Pouliot improved on those numbers by notching

36 points in 56 games, 53 points over 82 games. However, Pouliot might see a bit of a decline in production this year since it’ll be harder for him to get playing time next to McDavid. 16 out of his 26 even-strength points were scored when McDavid was on the ice with him last year but with Lucic on the team now, Pouliot will probably be stuck on the second line.

Oscar Klefbom- 6 goals, 27 assists, 33 points

If Klefbom had played in full 82-game seasons, he would probably have close to two 30-point seasons under his belt already. In his second year in the NHL, Klefbom only played in 69 games but was able to tally 20 points. Averaged out to 82 games and Klefbom would have had a 27-point season. But then last year, in only 30 games, Klefbom scored 12 points, a 33-point pace. If Klefbom can manage to play the entire year this season, I don’t see why he can’t post 30+ points with an outside shot at 40. He’ll probably finish with somewhere around 35 points but if he keeps progressing and takes some more powerplay time, 40 points isn’t completely out of the question.

Adam Larsson- 5 goals, 25 assists, 30 points

Larsson may have changed teams but I don’t think it will affect his fantasy potential too much. On the Devils, Larsson never showed much offensive potential and was put in an extremely defensive role. Considering the state of the Oilers defense and the reason why they traded for him, Larsson’s usage shouldn’t change too much. Last year Larsson only scored 18 points and he’s only had one season where he’s tallied more than 20 points. The increased responsibility will help his totals but Larsson has never given any hint that he can come close to the 40-point mark.

Andrej Sekera- 6 goals, 23 assists, 29 points

Entering the first year of his six-year contract, Sekera had a fine season for the Oilers, tallying six goals and 24 assists. Averaging about 22 minutes a night, Sekera was also an important piece on the powerplay, registering two goals and 12 assists with the man advantage. While he won’t be having 40+ point seasons like when he was in Carolina, Sekera should be good for around 30 points.

Cam Talbot- 26 wins, .919 SV%, 2.47 GAA, 3 Shutouts

Even though Talbot had some long stretches of bad play last year, he still managed to end the season with a respectable .917 save percentage. It’s not amazing but it’s better than average and now with a full season under his belt, Talbot should improve a little. Talbot has shown he has the potential to be a quality starting netminder as in New York, he posted save percentages of .941 and .926 in his first two seasons of his NHL career. While he might not reach those numbers again, he should have another good year in Edmonton.

*Big thanks to Scott Maran from All In Hockey for his Fantasy Hockey Preview of the Oilers going into 2016/17! If you liked what you read, please head over to his site www.allinhockey.com!*

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Beer League Hero, Edmonton Oilers, NHL, Walter Foddis

@Lowetide’s Interview With Walter Foddis

This morning, our very own Walter Foddis (@waltlaw69) had the glorious distinction of being interviewed by Oilogosphere royalty and the Godfather of Edmonton Oilers radio shows, Allan Mitchell aka Lowetide! They chatted about a plethora of things including Kris Versteeg’s potential impact on the Oilers’ roster, what might happen to Nail Yakupov, and should Brandon Davidson be used as trade fodder to bring in that elusive right-shooting defenceman?

I’ll be honest, I felt extremely proud after listening to the interview. I never thought that the site would reach the point to where TSN would be interviewing one of our contributors.

So Good you Walter! And thank you so much to Mr.Mitchell!

Here’s to many more appearances on radio shows, podcasts, etc. from the Beer League Heroes Family!

You catch more of Lowetide on his website www.lowetide.ca or Twitter!

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Edmonton Oilers, International, Michael Sifeldeen, NHL

McJesus and the World Cup Promised Land

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(I’ve got a copy of The Hockey News’ World Cup preview magazine in front of me as I write this, so if you’ve got a problem with any of the stats I’m quoting, take it up with them.) Ok, perfect. While the hockey world tries to figure out if they give a shit or not about the World Cup of Hockey, I’m sitting here looking at the rosters and immediately coming to the conclusion that Team North America is the team to beat, and then also seeing quickly after that no one who matters agrees with me. So, now, I’m going to go over a few key World Cup facts and figures here, and inject a healthy dose of bias and starry-eyed opinionated commentary to try and pull you firmly onto the Team NA bandwagon with me. Many of our more naysaying readers may be saying nay right now to Team North America’s chances of winning this tournament, and I’m going tell them, in as many words, why they’re dead wrong. Ready? Let’s do it.

Team NA is not significantly smaller or lighter than the other teams

Here are the average heights and weights of all the teams competing in this tournament:

Canada: 6’2″, 207lbs
Sweden: 6’1″, 200lbs
Finland: 6’1″, 199lbs
USA: 6’2″, 210lbs (Jesus Christ, get out of here, Byfuglien, you’re screwing up the metrics)
Russia: 6’1″, 200lbs
Czech Republic: 6’1″, 205lbs
Europe: 6’1″, 204lbs

And finally, Team North America coming in at a very respectable average height and weight of 6’2″, 200lbs. The NA boys have an inch on 5/8 teams, and weigh the same as or more than three others. This is a non-issue at these averages.

Team NA is significantly younger than any other team

The average ages of the World Cup teams:

Canada: 28.7
Sweden: 28.7
Finland: 25.9
USA: 29.0
Russia: 27.0
Europe: 29.9
Czech Republic: 27.3

And again, we have Team North America coming in at a young, but respectable, 21.7 years old on average. This is an age range where most of the players have about two-to-three years in the NHL under their belts, so they’re not green rookies, and they are at the age where their speed and reflexes will almost certainly be at or near their career high.

Team NA is Faster Than Any Other Team, and It’s Not Close

McDavid, Eichel, Larkin, Gaudreau, Droin, MacKinnon… this team is obscenely fast. Tell me how the defensive monsters on the Canadian squad like Doughty and Weber, or the Americans’
Johnson or Byfuglien are supposed to exert their power over these kids if they’re too big and slow to even keep up with them? Which leads me to the next point…

Defensive Size and Grit Won’t Matter*

It’s important to keep in mind that this isn’t a typical NHL playoff series grind, and won’t even really be reminiscent of regular season games. This is a short tournament. There won’t be significant contact, certainly no dirty plays with an NHL season about to start and a KHL season already underway, and fighting is out of the question. So where exactly do the big, intimidating bodies of the other national teams have a significant advantage over the quickness and skill of the North Americans?

*(09/10 Post-pre-tourney CAN vs USA games update: … *Except* for the CAN/USA games, apparently. Jesus.)

Plus, the Team NA Defensive Lineup is Amazing in Its Own Right

Ekblad, Ghost Bear, Jones, Murray, Parayko, Rielly, and Trouba? Are you kidding me? You’re looking at the future of NHL defence right now, and these guys haven’t even entered the prime of their careers yet. They’re dynamic and intelligent, and they can eat minutes along with the best of ’em. I’m not even kind of worried about this aspect of the team.

Don’t Worry about Team NA’s Goaltending

I laugh really, really hard and obnoxiously every time someone says the goaltending of Team North America is going to be their achilles heel. Yes, I too am super concerned about rookie-playoff-record-15-game-winning-Stanley-Cup-champion Matt Murray and All-Star Game player and Ducks’ 23-year-old bona fide starter John Gibson.

Puh-lease. These guys are killer. Obviously they’re not a Carey Price or a Henrik Lundqvist yet (I spelled The King’s name right the first time, just so you know), but what does that matter in a tiny preseason tournament? We aren’t testing these guys over the course of a 60-start season.

That’s the root of the problem with most criticism levied at this squad: it presumes the need for a bigger sample size than is necessary or warranted for the format and length of the tournament. Is anyone arguing that, historically, experience and grit wins championships? Of course not. But for the glorified preseason exhibition series the World Cup is poised to be, traditional evaluative factors don’t apply. Team North America is going to skate circles around the competition. They’re going to score ridiculous goals and come up with whacky, inventive shit that will wins them games because they’re young and fast and skilled, and that’s what’s going to matter.

In Conclusion

I wrote the bulk of this piece before the first pre-tournament games had taken place, so let me just acknowledge how wrong I was about the whole “no dirty plays, etc” bit. Clearly I underestimated the classlessness of some of the American squad (*cough*Kesler you still suck*cough*). So let me amend part of my statements to say that, for the majority of the teams, this isn’t going to be an all-out war of who can play the most boneheaded and outmoded brand of hockey.

I stand by my overall assessment that the North Americans are going to win it all based on their skill and speed, because they’re never going to have to play the Americans, because the Canadians will dispatch them before the group final round.

Where North America will win.

Because McJeez/Johnny Hockey/Eich is the most ridiculous first line I’ve ever heard of in my life and I refuse to stop fanboying. Goodnight, and may god have mercy on the rest of the world’s souls.

Our tribute to the Team Canada of ’87! Click the pic to get yours!